Choosing Sanity

I’ve been to the depths of insanity. Gone all the way down a dark and insane path.

The stuff of movies, the stuff of books. I was thinking those thoughts, saying those words. It was ugliness to my friends and family. I wore them out. I spent my time tilting at windmills and battling delusions. Joining insane causes. Because that is all easy stuff.

It’s easy to shake your fists at the government and battle cosmic forces. It’s easy to die on a trivial hill. It’s easy to “be right” about something even though you are wrong and you are crazy. It’s easy to give in to whatever demons you have, and to let them take over.

Admitting it here – copping to mental illness – is part of a journey.  Carrie Fisher did it, out loud, she said she was nuts. And Wil Wheaton does it daily. Brad Feld does it. Chris Brogan does it. Amber Naslund does it.  I don’t exactly get depressed (though that’s part of it), I get anxious and I lash out.  I give into paranoia and let the darker angels influence me. I chase people away because I am a rock. I am an island.

Enough. All of the insanity is optional.

I choose sanity. I choose it daily by having good habits and maintaining a good routine.

I choose sanity by working hard and developing experiences that matter.I choose sanity by loving my wife and my kids and forgiving the people that wronged me. Not holding onto nonsense. It’s all nonsense.

I choose sanity by loving my wife and my kids and forgiving the people that wronged me. Not holding onto nonsense. It’s all nonsense.

I choose sanity by changing my mind about things and not

I choose sanity by maintaining a routine that fills me up and creating projects that matter.

I’ve been insane before. And I’ve told lies.

I’ve indulged delusions and I have wrecked friendships, business relationships, and I’ve strained my family. I’ve given in to the devil-on-your-shoulder and lashed out for no good reason. I’ve put off work I need to do. Work that matters, and work that serves others.

Enough.

Enough.

It’s time to chose sanity.

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Christopher Johnson
 

Chris P. Johnson is the CPJ of this blog’s fame. He’s a family man, a new crossfitter, and a bad chess player in good practice. He runs the company Simplifilm which has done work for some of the best companies on the Internet.